Okay, I did this once before, but saw Jennifer had done it recently, and as an experiment, typed "ted needs" into Google once again, and was amused enough to make this post. I should be editing video right this minute, but I'm giving myself five minutes to write this up.
Type in your name and "needs" into Google and then write down the first 10 coherent things that come up.
1. "Ted needs someone to be there 100% of the time." So true.
2. "Ted needs a 24 hour staffed program which can assist him with taking his medications." Well damn, that might help, actually.
3. "Ted needs a shower." Really? How did I get so filthy in two hours? (Wait, don't answer that.)
4. "Handsome Ted needs a home." I actually have one, but thanks for the complimentary adjective.
5. "Ted needs to step down. And he needs to step down immediately." A compliment followed by an insult. Thanks a lot, internet.
6. "Uncle Ted needs you." Heh. I like pervy roleplaying.
7. "Theodore needs a date!" How did that come up when I searched for "Ted needs"? Google must be psychic about my real needs.
8. "Ted needs a home." I guess I'm no longer handsome.
9. "Ted needs to sleep." Occasionally, yes.
10. "Ted needs some nads." Aww...that's not nice.
Well, that's not a good note to end on. Let's do a bonus one.
11. "Ted needs to be appreciated a little more." Aww, that's sweet. Thanks, Google!
(BTW, the image in this post was on the first page I got on Google Images when searching for "Ted Needs". Back to video editing!)